A Father's Pain by kirallie

Story Notes:

Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.

John frowned as he stared at his phone. A part of him yearned to ring Sam, apologise for what he’d done four years ago and another part couldn’t deal with admitting he’d been wrong. He should never have kicked Sam out, things hadn’t been the same since Dean had driven his brother to the bus stop. Dean had drifted away from him since then, oh Dean had hunted with him for the first two years but then he’d started searching for solo gigs, especially ones that took him to California. John wondered if Dean was talking to Sam or if he merely drove by to check Sam was okay.

He’d barely had contact with anyone since Dean had left him but he’d finally picked up the demon’s trail. He should probably call for some sort of backup but this was a family matter and he was not dragging Dean into a fight that could so easily kill him. As for Sam...would the kid even pick up if John called?

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“Sam get back here!” Dean yelled, trying to catch up to his brother despite knowing it was not going to happen. Sam was faster than him normally thanks to his rather long legs but during a full moon? He’d bet the kid could almost keep up with his baby. At least they weren’t hunting, well Sam was hunting his dinner but a deer wasn’t going to be able to hurt him. Dean always insisted on going with Sam on his ‘wild nights’ he didn’t like the thought of Sam being alone without backup in the woods, what if another hunter was out there and thought Sam was a normal werewolf? Dean knew Sam would not kill to defend himself but Dean was willing too if necessary.

A playful yip was his only warning as Sam barrelled into him, sending them both flying, Sam making sure to land on the bottom. He’d lost all discomfort at seeing Sam’s werewolf features over the last four months so when Sam grinned at him he simply gave Sam a playful slap. Sam was so free on these nights that it was amazing to see, who knew it would take being turned into a supernatural creature for Sam to let go? They got into a mock wrestling match and Dean knew Sam let him win, no way could his human strength match Sam’s but it was still fun. Then Sam was scenting the air and licking his lips hungrily. He looked at Dean who nodded and then he was off after his dinner. Dean scrambled up and took off after him again.

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John pulled into the motel and then smiled as he saw a familiar Impala parked outside the rooms. It would be good to see Dean again after so long. He parked and then froze as the room door opened and out spilled Dean and...Sam? John stared at his sons in awe as the two fooled around, taking in all the changes Sam had undergone in four years. The kid had managed to get even taller though he’d filled out to suit his height finally. His hair was almost down to his shoulders now and hid his eyes but there was something else different about him that John couldn’t quite put his finger on. Why was Sam with Dean and not at college? Had something happened? Or was he on holiday and spending time with Dean? Didn’t look like they were on a hunt. John slowly opened his door and got out, watching as Sam stiffened and then spun around as if he knew John was there.

“Sammy?” Dean called and then he spotted John too.

“Hello boys.” John called, shoving his hands in his pockets so his sons wouldn’t realise how nervous he was.

“Dad? What are you doing here?” Dean asked and John shrugged.

“Headed through to New York and was just stopping for the night. It’...it’s good to see you boys.” He added and Sam looked at Dean, seeming nervous. Dean just nudged him slightly.

“Good to see you too sir.” Sam answered softly and Dean nodded.

“You had dinner yet? Maybe we could eat together?” John tried and Sam swallowed heavily. Was his son really that nervous around him? He should never have done what he did.

“Okay Dad, sounds good.” Dean answered and they headed for the Impala.
“There’s a diner two blocks away that’s pretty decent, you can follow us.” Dean called and John nodded, getting back in his truck as the Impala started.

“Dean...” Sam whimpered and Dean laid a hand on his arm.

“It’ll be okay Sam, place isn’t fancy enough to have actual silverware. You’ll just have to stomach your meat a bit more cooked than usual. Dad won’t hang around long, just stay cool and he won’t know.” Dean reassured his brother despite the fear he felt. What would John do if he learnt the truth? They pulled into the diner and John parked beside them, following them inside silently. They sat down and ordered and Sam fidgeted slightly.

“Sam I...I know we fought and things were said. It’s good to see you kid, you’re looking good.” John tried and Sam looked up at him.
“You on vacation?”

“Yeah.” Sam answered, lying because if he told the truth his Dad would want to know why he’d left school.
“Went to Bobby’s and Dean showed up.”

“That’s good.” John commented, looking between his boys and knowing they were hiding something but what? He saw Dean and Sam suddenly focus on the door and frown so he turned in his seat and groaned, this was not going to be good.

Three men walked inside, faces hidden by ski masks and guns in hand. People started screaming in fear, parents holding their children close as the men went to the register for the money, two of them turning their guns on the patrons.

“We picked a great diner.” Dean muttered and Sam shook his head. John was tense, making sure he was between the gunmen and his children, despite the fact they were grown men and just as dangerous as he was, he was still their father. Everything was okay until a little girl came out of the restrooms and screamed. Sam saw the gun move to aim at her, the trigger beginning to be pulled and he moved, throwing himself out of the booth and at the girl. He wrapped himself around her as the gun went off and his body jerked from the impact. Everyone was screaming and the gunmen took off.

“Sam!” John yelled, dropping to his knees beside his baby boy and praying he’d been hit somewhere non-vital. A man came up beside him with fear in his eyes.

“My baby.” He whispered and John realised it was his little girl under Sam.

“Sam can you hear me?” Dean called as he joined them and they all felt relief when he moaned.
“They’re gone Sam, pass me the kid.” Slowly Sam moved so the girl was uncovered and Dean scooped her up, passing the crying girl to her grateful father.

“I’ve called 911!” A waitress said as she handed John a bundle of tablecloths and he nodded, searching for the wound.

“Dad no.” Sam whispered and John looked at him in shock as he spoke. The he saw it, the blood stain spreading across Sam’s shirt.

“It’s okay Sam, just lie still and try to stay awake, ambulance will be here soon.” John soothed, wrapping the clothes around Sam as a makeshift bandage, making Sam grimace and cry out in pain.

“No Dad, Dean?” Sam called and Dean grabbed his hand.

“I’m here Sammy.” He said, gently brushing Sam’s hair back.

“No hospital, can’t risk.” Sam whispered and Dean’s eyes widened.

“Shit. Dad we need to get Sam out of here.” Dean said, moving to help Sam sit up, letting Sam’s rest against him. John just stared in shock, had they lost their minds.

“Dean we can’t patch this up, he needs professional help.”

“Dad please, just trust me. Sam can’t go to hospital.” Dean begged and John looked from him to Sam. Pained hazel eyes stared at him, begging for help and he finally nodded.

“Okay, you take his upper body and I’ll take his legs, we’ll lay him out in the Impala’s backseat. This is gonna hurt Sammy but just stay with us.” Sam managed a tired nod in reply and they lifted him as gently as possible.

“Sir!” One of the staff called in horror and John glared, making the man back off. They got Sam to the car as they heard sirens approaching.

“Give me your room key and I’ll get your stuff. We need to change motels.” John called and Dean threw the key to him before jumping in the car and flooring it.

“Hang on Sammy.” Dean whispered as he drove.

“Not silver.” Sam murmured and Dean nodded, silver or not Sam was still losing blood and that couldn’t be good for him. Dean dreaded trying to explain to their Dad why they had insisted on no hospital, let alone how fast he knew Sam would begin to heal soon. Dean pulled into another motel and checked himself for blood before getting out and getting a room.

“Can you help me here or do we need to wait for Dad?” He asked and Sam opened his eyes, reaching for Dean’s arm. Taking that as an answer Dean reached in and helped Sam out of the car, taking almost all of his brother’s weight as they staggered to the door. He put Sam down on the bed and then went to get the medical kit form the car. He nodded as his Dad pulled in.

“You got him inside?” John asked in disbelief and Dean nodded. John followed him in and froze as he saw Sam lying so still and pale on the bed. Dean moved to his brother’s side and began peeling off the bandages and the many layers of shirts Sam tended to wear. He winced when he saw the hole in Sam’s chest, fighting the urge to throw up. Sam reached out and grabbed his hand, managing a small smile.

“S’okay Dean.” He whispered and Dean nodded.

“Oh Sammy.” John breathed, seeing the damage and knowing Sam really needed a hospital. How could Dean think he could patch this up. Sam looked at him and smiled but John could see the fear in his son’s eyes.

“Don’t be mad Dad.” Sam breathed and then passed out.

“Dean what the hell is going on?” John demanded as he watched Dean clean and re-bandage the wound before standing up.

“Give me your gun.” Dean demanded and John stared in shock.

“What?”

“Your gun Dad, I’m not risking...” Dean trailed off and John felt his heart freeze. There was only one reason for Dean to demand his weapon and agree not to take Sam to a hospital and that was if John’s normal response to what was going to happen was to shoot.

“No.” He whispered, gaze going to where Sam was lying on the bed. A shot like that, Sam should be dead by now he realised and he closed his eyes.

“If you’re staying I need your gun.” Dean demanded and John opened his eyes to stare sadly at Dean.

“What...what is he?” John asked and Dean glared at him.

“He’s your son!” Dean grabbed John by the front of his shirt angrily and he didn’t struggle.

“I know that Dean. I know I haven’t always...I’m not going to hurt him Dean.” John answered softly and Dean relaxed his grip.

“Promise?” Dean asked and John simply handed over his gun and knife. Dean slumped slightly and John grasped his shoulder.

“Let me help son.” John asked and Dean nodded.

“Werewolf.” Dean finally said and John gasped, looking over at Sam.
“He’s not dangerous Dad, he’s still our Sammy. Bobby found him on a hunt, Sam saved his life on the night of a full moon. He has control, he eats animal hearts, not human.” Dean rushed to explain and John felt a swell of pride that Sam could control the beast. He moved to sit beside Sam, gently brushing sweat soaked bangs from Sam’s face and Sam twitched slightly, moaning in pain.

“How long will it take him to heal?” He asked and Dean shrugged.

“It took him a day to heal a stab so maybe two or three? He...he hasn’t been hurt this badly before.”

“As soon as he healed a bit we need to leave town, too many people saw him get shot.” John said and Dean nodded.
“Get some sleep Dean, I’ll stay up.” John ordered and Dean obediently got ready to sleep. Dean watched him warily for a while but eventually fell asleep. It hurt that Dean didn’t trust him not to hurt Sam but he couldn’t really blame him. John gently bathed Sam’s forehead with a cool cloth and was surprised when Sam’s eyes opened a slit.
“It’s okay Sam, just sleep and heal.” John whispered and Sam’s eyes struggled to focus on him.
“Shhhh.”

“Dad...sorry...disappointment....” Sam struggled to get out and John closed his eyes in pain.

“No Sammy, you’re not a disappointment. I am so proud of you kiddo. You’re going to be okay, Dean and I’ll watch over you.” John soothed and Sam just stared up at him, not fully understanding, before he eyes slipped shut again.

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Sam felt sore and sleepy but he forced his eyes open and then stared in surprise at his Dad’ form sleeping on a chair beside his bed. Surely he’d realised Sam wasn’t human anymore so why? He tried to move only to groan in pain and John’s eyes snapped open. Sam tensed in fear and John frowned.

“Take it easy Sammy. Dean’s still asleep, you should be too kiddo.” John soothed and Sam stared, wide eyed.
“Sam? Are you okay?” John reached out to check for fever and Sam flinched back.
“Sammy, no. It’s okay. Dean explained last night.”

“You’re not going to...kill me?” Sam whispered and John closed his eyes.

“No Sam, never. You’re my son, no matter what. I’m so sorry Sam, for everything. I should never have told you to stay gone. But we’re together again now and we’ll stay that way, okay?” John asked and Sam stared in wonder.

“You mean it?” He asked and John gently pulled Sam into a hug.

“I mean it.” He answered, fighting the pain as he realised how badly he’d hurt both his boys, but Sam most of all.
“Things will be different this time, I promise.” He whispered and Sam smiled, neither noticed Dean awake in the other bed, smile happily at the realisation his family was whole again.

The End.

The End.

kirallie is the author of 80 other stories.

This story is part of the series, Wolf Sam. The previous story in the series is Brother Wolf. The next story in the series is A Father's Love.

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A Father's Pain by kirallie [Reviews - 0] Table of Contents - Text Size + Story Notes: Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended. John frowned as he stared at his phone. A part of him yearned to ring Sam, apologise for what he’d done four years ago and another part couldn’t deal with admitting he’d been wrong. He should never have kicked Sam out, things hadn’t been the same since Dean had driven his brother to the bus stop. Dean had drifted away from him since then, oh Dean had hunted with him for the first two years but then he’d started searching for solo gigs, especially ones that took him to California. John wondered if Dean was talking to Sam or if he merely drove by to check Sam was okay. He’d barely had contact with anyone since Dean had left him but he’d finally picked up the demon’s trail. He should probably call for some sort of backup but this was a family matter and he was not dragging Dean into a fight that could so easily kill him. As for Sam...would the kid even pick up if John called? -------------------------------------- “Sam get back here!” Dean yelled, trying to catch up to his brother despite knowing it was not going to happen. Sam was faster than him normally thanks to his rather long legs but during a full moon? He’d bet the kid could almost keep up with his baby. At least they weren’t hunting, well Sam was hunting his dinner but a deer wasn’t going to be able to hurt him. Dean always insisted on going with Sam on his ‘wild nights’ he didn’t like the thought of Sam being alone without backup in the woods, what if another hunter was out there and thought Sam was a normal werewolf? Dean knew Sam would not kill to defend himself but Dean was willing too if necessary. A playful yip was his only warning as Sam barrelled into him, sending them both flying, Sam making sure to land on the bottom. He’d lost all discomfort at seeing Sam’s werewolf features over the last four months so when Sam grinned at him he simply gave Sam a playful slap. Sam was so free on these nights that it was amazing to see, who knew it would take being turned into a supernatural creature for Sam to let go? They got into a mock wrestling match and Dean knew Sam let him win, no way could his human strength match Sam’s but it was still fun. Then Sam was scenting the air and licking his lips hungrily. He looked at Dean who nodded and then he was off after his dinner. Dean scrambled up and took off after him again. ---------------------------------- John pulled into the motel and then smiled as he saw a familiar Impala parked outside the rooms. It would be good to see Dean again after so long. He parked and then froze as the room door opened and out spilled Dean and...Sam? John stared at his sons in awe as the two fooled around, taking in all the changes Sam had undergone in four years. The kid had managed to get even taller though he’d filled out to suit his height finally. His hair was almost down to his shoulders now and hid his eyes but there was something else different about him that John couldn’t quite put his finger on. Why was Sam with Dean and not at college? Had something happened? Or was he on holiday and spending time with Dean? Didn’t look like they were on a hunt. John slowly opened his door and got out, watching as Sam stiffened and then spun around as if he knew John was there. “Sammy?” Dean called and then he spotted John too. “Hello boys.” John called, shoving his hands in his pockets so his sons wouldn’t realise how nervous he was. “Dad? What are you doing here?” Dean asked and John shrugged. “Headed through to New York and was just stopping for the night. It’...it’s good to see you boys.” He added and Sam looked at Dean, seeming nervous. Dean just nudged him slightly. “Good to see you too sir.” Sam answered softly and Dean nodded. “You had dinner yet? Maybe we could eat together?” John tried and Sam swallowed heavily. Was his son really that nervous around him? He should never have done what he did. “Okay Dad, sounds good.” Dean answered and they headed for the Impala. “There’s a diner two blocks away that’s pretty decent, you can follow us.” Dean called and John nodded, getting back in his truck as the Impala started. “Dean...” Sam whimpered and Dean laid a hand on his arm. “It’ll be okay Sam, place isn’t fancy enough to have actual silverware. You’ll just have to stomach your meat a bit more cooked than usual. Dad won’t hang around long, just stay cool and he won’t know.” Dean reassured his brother despite the fear he felt. What would John do if he learnt the truth? They pulled into the diner and John parked beside them, following them inside silently. They sat down and ordered and Sam fidgeted slightly. “Sam I...I know we fought and things were said. It’s good to see you kid, you’re looking good.” John tried and Sam looked up at him. “You on vacation?” “Yeah.” Sam answered, lying because if he told the truth his Dad would want to know why he’d left school. “Went to Bobby’s and Dean showed up.” “That’s good.” John commented, looking between his boys and knowing they were hiding something but what? He saw Dean and Sam suddenly focus on the door and frown so he turned in his seat and groaned, this was not going to be good. Three men walked inside, faces hidden by ski masks and guns in hand. People started screaming in fear, parents holding their children close as the men went to the register for the money, two of them turning their guns on the patrons. “We picked a great diner.” Dean muttered and Sam shook his head. John was tense, making sure he was between the gunmen and his children, despite the fact they were grown men and just as dangerous as he was, he was still their father. Everything was okay until a little girl came out of the restrooms and screamed. Sam saw the gun move to aim at her, the trigger beginning to be pulled and he moved, throwing himself out of the booth and at the girl. He wrapped himself around her as the gun went off and his body jerked from the impact. Everyone was screaming and the gunmen took off. “Sam!” John yelled, dropping to his knees beside his baby boy and praying he’d been hit somewhere non-vital. A man came up beside him with fear in his eyes. “My baby.” He whispered and John realised it was his little girl under Sam. “Sam can you hear me?” Dean called as he joined them and they all felt relief when he moaned. “They’re gone Sam, pass me the kid.” Slowly Sam moved so the girl was uncovered and Dean scooped her up, passing the crying girl to her grateful father. “I’ve called 911!” A waitress said as she handed John a bundle of tablecloths and he nodded, searching for the wound. “Dad no.” Sam whispered and John looked at him in shock as he spoke. The he saw it, the blood stain spreading across Sam’s shirt. “It’s okay Sam, just lie still and try to stay awake, ambulance will be here soon.” John soothed, wrapping the clothes around Sam as a makeshift bandage, making Sam grimace and cry out in pain. “No Dad, Dean?” Sam called and Dean grabbed his hand. “I’m here Sammy.” He said, gently brushing Sam’s hair back. “No hospital, can’t risk.” Sam whispered and Dean’s eyes widened. “Shit. Dad we need to get Sam out of here.” Dean said, moving to help Sam sit up, letting Sam’s rest against him. John just stared in shock, had they lost their minds. “Dean we can’t patch this up, he needs professional help.” “Dad please, just trust me. Sam can’t go to hospital.” Dean begged and John looked from him to Sam. Pained hazel eyes stared at him, begging for help and he finally nodded. “Okay, you take his upper body and I’ll take his legs, we’ll lay him out in the Impala’s backseat. This is gonna hurt Sammy but just stay with us.” Sam managed a tired nod in reply and they lifted him as gently as possible. “Sir!” One of the staff called in horror and John glared, making the man back off. They got Sam to the car as they heard sirens approaching. “Give me your room key and I’ll get your stuff. We need to change motels.” John called and Dean threw the key to him before jumping in the car and flooring it. “Hang on Sammy.” Dean whispered as he drove. “Not silver.” Sam murmured and Dean nodded, silver or not Sam was still losing blood and that couldn’t be good for him. Dean dreaded trying to explain to their Dad why they had insisted on no hospital, let alone how fast he knew Sam would begin to heal soon. Dean pulled into another motel and checked himself for blood before getting out and getting a room. “Can you help me here or do we need to wait for Dad?” He asked and Sam opened his eyes, reaching for Dean’s arm. Taking that as an answer Dean reached in and helped Sam out of the car, taking almost all of his brother’s weight as they staggered to the door. He put Sam down on the bed and then went to get the medical kit form the car. He nodded as his Dad pulled in. “You got him inside?” John asked in disbelief and Dean nodded. John followed him in and froze as he saw Sam lying so still and pale on the bed. Dean moved to his brother’s side and began peeling off the bandages and the many layers of shirts Sam tended to wear. He winced when he saw the hole in Sam’s chest, fighting the urge to throw up. Sam reached out and grabbed his hand, managing a small smile. “S’okay Dean.” He whispered and Dean nodded. “Oh Sammy.” John breathed, seeing the damage and knowing Sam really needed a hospital. How could Dean think he could patch this up. Sam looked at him and smiled but John could see the fear in his son’s eyes. “Don’t be mad Dad.” Sam breathed and then passed out. “Dean what the hell is going on?” John demanded as he watched Dean clean and re-bandage the wound before standing up. “Give me your gun.” Dean demanded and John stared in shock. “What?” “Your gun Dad, I’m not risking...” Dean trailed off and John felt his heart freeze. There was only one reason for Dean to demand his weapon and agree not to take Sam to a hospital and that was if John’s normal response to what was going to happen was to shoot. “No.” He whispered, gaze going to where Sam was lying on the bed. A shot like that, Sam should be dead by now he realised and he closed his eyes. “If you’re staying I need your gun.” Dean demanded and John opened his eyes to stare sadly at Dean. “What...what is he?” John asked and Dean glared at him. “He’s your son!” Dean grabbed John by the front of his shirt angrily and he didn’t struggle. “I know that Dean. I know I haven’t always...I’m not going to hurt him Dean.” John answered softly and Dean relaxed his grip. “Promise?” Dean asked and John simply handed over his gun and knife. Dean slumped slightly and John grasped his shoulder. “Let me help son.” John asked and Dean nodded. “Werewolf.” Dean finally said and John gasped, looking over at Sam. “He’s not dangerous Dad, he’s still our Sammy. Bobby found him on a hunt, Sam saved his life on the night of a full moon. He has control, he eats animal hearts, not human.” Dean rushed to explain and John felt a swell of pride that Sam could control the beast. He moved to sit beside Sam, gently brushing sweat soaked bangs from Sam’s face and Sam twitched slightly, moaning in pain. “How long will it take him to heal?” He asked and Dean shrugged. “It took him a day to heal a stab so maybe two or three? He...he hasn’t been hurt this badly before.” “As soon as he healed a bit we need to leave town, too many people saw him get shot.” John said and Dean nodded. “Get some sleep Dean, I’ll stay up.” John ordered and Dean obediently got ready to sleep. Dean watched him warily for a while but eventually fell asleep. It hurt that Dean didn’t trust him not to hurt Sam but he couldn’t really blame him. John gently bathed Sam’s forehead with a cool cloth and was surprised when Sam’s eyes opened a slit. “It’s okay Sam, just sleep and heal.” John whispered and Sam’s eyes struggled to focus on him. “Shhhh.” “Dad...sorry...disappointment....” Sam struggled to get out and John closed his eyes in pain. “No Sammy, you’re not a disappointment. I am so proud of you kiddo. You’re going to be okay, Dean and I’ll watch over you.” John soothed and Sam just stared up at him, not fully understanding, before he eyes slipped shut again. ---------------------------------- Sam felt sore and sleepy but he forced his eyes open and then stared in surprise at his Dad’ form sleeping on a chair beside his bed. Surely he’d realised Sam wasn’t human anymore so why? He tried to move only to groan in pain and John’s eyes snapped open. Sam tensed in fear and John frowned. “Take it easy Sammy. Dean’s still asleep, you should be too kiddo.” John soothed and Sam stared, wide eyed. “Sam? Are you okay?” John reached out to check for fever and Sam flinched back. “Sammy, no. It’s okay. Dean explained last night.” “You’re not going to...kill me?” Sam whispered and John closed his eyes. “No Sam, never. You’re my son, no matter what. I’m so sorry Sam, for everything. I should never have told you to stay gone. But we’re together again now and we’ll stay that way, okay?” John asked and Sam stared in wonder. “You mean it?” He asked and John gently pulled Sam into a hug. “I mean it.” He answered, fighting the pain as he realised how badly he’d hurt both his boys, but Sam most of all. “Things will be different this time, I promise.” He whispered and Sam smiled, neither noticed Dean awake in the other bed, smile happily at the realisation his family was whole again. The End. The End. kirallie is the author of 80 other stories. This story is part of the series, Wolf Sam. The previous story in the series is Brother Wolf. The next story in the series is A Father's Love. 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Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. No money is being made from this work. No copyright infringement is intended. Archive running on eFiction 3.5.x, software developed & maintained by The eFiction Project http://www.efiction.org/ :: Archive design based on original skin designed by Sally Anderson. All Rights Reserved.