"So, the All-American road trip!" Steve stated as the scenery outside whipped by.
"Why are you so happy?" Tony growled in reply. "I can't believe Fury got Pepper to go along with this! My girlfriend betrayed me!"
"You're just mad that she convinced Jarvis to take her side," Steve pointed out. "Now, you have no way to escape, just like the rest of us."
"Whatever." Tony pouted before turning to Clint. "Slow down!"
"I just want this over with," Clint replied as he took pressure off the gas pedal.
"It wouldn't matter," Natasha said from the front passenger seat. "We'd just have to share a hotel until the time is up. You heard Fury. This exercise is to last three weeks. Unless there's another catastrophe they call us in for, we're stuck."
"We'll be in Philadelphia soon. That should be our first stop," Bruce said from the very back of the mini-van from behind a large map.
"I've always wanted to see the Liberty Bell and Independence Hall," Steve remarked.
"A bell and a hall?" Thor asked, confused.
Bruce started to fold the map up. "Both integral to the birth of America. I'll explain them to you before we get there."
"Downtown it is," Clint grumbled while he whipped between two cars to change lanes.
"The bell is cracked," Thor pointed out. "Why hasn't your symbol of liberty been fixed?"
"When Bruce is done crying, he'll explain it to you," Tony replied with a roll of his eyes.
Bruce glared. "So, I have a tear in my eye. It's moving!"
"Whatever." Tony glowered back before stomping towards the exit.
"Tony!" Natasha called out. "We have to get photographic evidence that we were here!"
Sighing, Tony strode back to the group. "Let's get this over with."
"Who has the camera?" Clint asked.
"I do," Thor stated as he pulled out the digital camera. "If you'll all get together, I'll take the photo."
"You know how to work one of those?" Steve asked. "I still don't quite get how those digital things work."
Thor nodded. "I skimmed the manual. Your tech is very basic at first glance, but after a second look, it can be complex..."
"Just take the photo," Steve said. "Our tour time for touring Independence Hall is coming up."
"I think we should skip DC," Natasha stated from the driver's seat.
"Why?" Tony asked from the front passenger's seat as he fiddled with the radio. "Ooo! We have Sirius."
"How can we fit him in this vehicle?" Thor asked, looking confused. "Especially if he takes his dog form to keep your police from recognizing him?"
There was stunned silence in the mini-van. Until it was broken by Thor's laughter. "Oh... That was a good one. I got you all."
"You've read the Harry Potter books?" Bruce asked.
"Yes... Most of them were quite good," Thor replied, smirking.
Steve shrugged. "I couldn't get past the fourth one."
"Anyway," Tony said with a shake of his head. "Why should we avoid DC?"
"I have... personal reasons," Natasha replied.
"Well, then," Clint said as he pulled out the map. "I guess we're skipping it. Let's see what's next."
"Wonderful." Tony glanced at the pamphlet in his hand. "Oooo! Classic Vinyl... Let's see... Channel twenty six..."
"I vote we have limits on music," Bruce stated, staring at Tony's back.
"I second that," Clint added. "But, how?"
"Everyone gets one hour to pick a station?" Natasha suggested as she slipped the mini-van behind a Greyhound bus.
"I can agree to that," Tony replied.
Clint nodded. "Me too."
"I do not know your music very well... So, I agree as well, as I will hear different tunes each hour," Thor stated.
"I think you're going to regret that," Bruce replied. "But..." After a quick sigh, he nodded. "Yes, that's reasonable."
"Great... Good...." Tony said with a broad grin. "I'll go first."
"I call dibs on second!" Natasha added before anyone else could.
"I'm third," Bruce replied.
Silence fell for twenty minutes until Clint whined, "I'm hungry."
Natasha sighed as she passed a semi. "Then, why didn't you get something at the gas station?"
"Pork rind?" Thor offered.
"No, thanks," Clint replied before turning towards Natasha. "I want real food! Not crap."
Thor looked confused. "Is it not a tradition to eat 'crap' on a road trip? Did you all lie to me?"
"We do eat 'crap'," Tony stated as he turned around in his seat, his head bouncing along to the beat of a Pink Floyd song. "A lot of it. I don't know what Barton's problem is."
"Remember, we're supposed to use first names. 'To build camaraderie' was what Fury said," Bruce pointed out.
"Fine! I don't know what Clint's problem is. Is that better?"
"Much," Bruce said with a twist of his lips.
"I... need... protein," Clint ground out. "Feed me!"
There's a Cracker Barrel at the next exit." Natasha sighed again.
"This doesn't count against my hour!" Tony exclaimed. "I want a full hour of good music before I have to listen to all of your trash."
"Hour's up!" Natasha gleefully stated as she double checked the station listing sheet from the glove box.
"Yeah, yeah..." Tony replied from the driver's seat. "Why do I have to drive when it isn't my music playing?"
"It was your turn," Thor pointed out.
Tony shrugged. "Whatever. Anyway, Natasha, what crap station are we listening to?"
"Top 40 Hits," she replied as she handed the sheet back to Steve, as it was his turn in the front. "Channel two please."
After the station change, Thor started to bob his head along with the music. "I like the beat on this one."
"Why is she bringing her stuff to parties?" Steve asked.
Natasha looked confused. "Huh?"
"The woman singing. She says men touch her junk. Why does she bring 'junk' to clubs? Is she selling it?" Steve asked, perplexed.
Tony replied, "Actually..."
"Tony!" Bruce exclaimed before answering Steve. "Ummm... She means her womanly bits."
Steve paused, then blinked, before exclaiming, "WHAT! And, that's played on the radio?!"
Natasha nodded. "Wait until Clint has his hour. You haven't heard questionable lyrics until you've heard his rap."
"Right... We've been traveling for how many hours now?" Tony asked before flipping off the corvette that sped past him.
"Long enough. Let's just find a hotel or something," Steve replied with a yawn.
Thor shook himself awake. "Hmmm?"
Tony nodded. "There's a Holiday Inn ahead."
"Works for me," Bruce added.
Ten minutes later, the six crawled out of the mini-van and stretched before heading into the lobby.
"Can I help you?" the front desk clerk asked with a broad smile.
"Yes, thank you, Cherie," Steve replied as he read the clerk's name tag. "We need three rooms please for the night."
"Of course!" Cherie said as she reached for her keyboard. "I'll need a driver's license and a credit card."
A short time later, Steve held keycard envelopes for the three rooms. "So, how are we dividing this out?"
"Clint and I are sharing a room," Natasha stated as she grabbed one of the envelopes.
Tony waggled his eyebrows. "So, are you two using both beds, or just one?"
Clint smirked while Natasha rolled her eyes and replied over her shoulder as the two walked away, "Wouldn't you like to know."
"How are we dividing the last two rooms?" Bruce asked.
"I'll arm wrestle all three of you for first rights of picking a roommate," Thor said with a grin.
Steve chuckled. "Maybe tomorrow... How about tonight, you and I share a room, and the two geniuses there can share one."
Grabbing a keycard, Tony started to stride off. "Fine. I just want to sleep."
"I get the bed by the window!" Bruce called out as he tried to catch up with Tony.