"I'm going to run away." Ron says in the early morning hours after he's back in the Gryffindor Tower. "Mum and Dad will have to make her stop being so mean to me." Getting up he sneaks out of the room, sneaking out of the door and down the to the kitchen, after all he can't run away on an empty stomach.

"Nnnnoooooo!" he cries out in dismay. The elves have finished their preparations for breakfast. . .there's nobody there. And more importantly. . .there's no food there. How can he run away without food?

Heading to the Great Hall, he leaves a whimpering note about how everybody is being mean to him and how they'll all be sorry before he exits the Great Hall, not looking back.

"Mr. Potter, can you come up here?" Albus asks, reading the note that had been at his place. Harry looks at the other early risers at Gryffindor, this early on a Sunday morning only a handful of students are there. Hermione shrugs at him and he gets up, going over to the head table. Albus, his lips twitching suspiciously, hands the note over to Harry. He reads it, blinks, reads it again, and then cackles.

"Ginny, Fred, George, Ron ran away. Everybody's being mean to him."

Ginny looks over at Harry, then lays her head on the table and cackles. The twins fall off their chairs and roll on the floor.

"How long do you think he'll be gone?"

"Knowing ickle ronnie-kins?" Fred says.

"I give it an hour." George says. "He'll come out looking for food." They say in unison. Everybody else laughs.

"I suppose we should tell Molly and Arthur."

"After breakfast." Minerva says firmly. "He'll probably be back by then because he's hungry." She smirks as Umbit. . .err Umbridge comes into the room. "Your problem child ran away from home because you were mean to him." She hands down the letter, watching the other woman's face turn pale then a dark red that should have had Poppy forcing potions down her throat before she collapsed. . .except she doesn't like the other woman either. A hoarse growl has her flinging the paper towards the others as she stalks out.

"Minerva. . .really." Albus chides. "That wasn't nice."

"No, but it was fun." She smirks. "How was Ron's potions session last night?"

"As usual. She had to force him to stop whining and work, he threatened her with Molly, she told him she was going to beat him like a rug. . .it was beautiful."

"And his potions?"

"Abysmal as usual, I refused to grade them and told her of the service the ministry offers to home-schooled students. She didn't want to pay that kind of money and was planning on forcing Black to grade them for her. . .until she realized she had ordered the man threw through the veil and realized that he might not be inclined to help her." Sniggers from the other teachers. "And that she had to do this all over again since Ron 'I can't be bothered to write anything down' Weasley didn't document his work."

Assorted twitters and snickers from the teachers at the table. Umbridge comes into the Great Hall under a full head of steam, heading outside. She screaming Ron's name and threatening his life as the door closes.

"By the end of breakfast you said?" Albus asks George.

"Yeah, he'll be hungwy, tired, and. . ." George looks up at the ceiling of the Great Hall. "Wet."

"How did the fool expect to get all the way back to the Burrow on foot?"

"But he's ickle Ronnie-kins, everybody has to bend over and kiss his ass." Ginny says in a sing-song voice. "He probably expected the Hogswart Express to be waiting at the train station to take him back to London where he'd head to the Leaky Cauldron and beg a floocall from Tom. Barring that, walk to Hogsmeade and beg a floo call from Madam Rosemarta. He didn't stop to think that either of them might wonder what he's doing home from school . . .alone . .and investigate."

"And of course Mum will immediately swoop him up into her arms, kiss his tired little brow, feed him a big helping nine plate meal, then tuck him up in bed and sing him to sleep. George says mockingly. "She's more likely to whallop him upside the head, screech at him for a couple of hours, then send him back with his tail between his legs."

"Has Umbit. . .err Umbridge. . ." Minerva says firmly. "Said anything about a wand for Weasley? The weighing of the wands is in a couple days and he'll need one for that at least."

"I don't believe that she intends to travel to Bulgaria to get him a wand, but the United States has 'ready-made' wands, all you have to do is assemble them. They're not as competent as a custom-made wand, mostly used for first year students in their schools until they've come into their magic and want a better one."

"And with Weasley's total lack of focus, he won't need another one for a couple of years when he breaks this one." Snape purrs. The others laugh and nod. Sirius comes into the room, looking worriedly at the front table for a minute.

"Do I want to know?" He asks Harry.

"Ron ran away from home because everybody's being mean to him."

"Ahhh gotcha. Molly and Arthur?"

"Going to be called after breakfast. . ."

"Since ickle Ronniekin will come dragging in sooner or later whining he's hungry."

Sirius nods again. "Severus, can I talk to you after breakfast? I got the reports back on the others work and I'm confused about something."

"Bring their potions and the paperwork to my office after breakfast." Sirius nods. "Now, I've got the paperwork for you four to take your tests early. Neville, are you sure you don't want to do it as well?"

"No thank you Lord Black, I know I'm not ready yet, maybe by this summer. Grams is pleased with my progress. Once Professor McGonagall realized I was using a wand that hadn't selected me, she realized what a fool she'd been trying to mold me into my father and let me become my own person."

The door across the room flies open with a crash and a raging Umbridge comes into the room dragging Ron Weasley by the back of his robe. Albus sighs and puts down his napkin, heading for his office to call Arthur and Molly.

"How far did he get?"

"Not even to the edge of the Hogwarts wards. He was cold and hungry and his feet hurt."

"Hey Weasley, if you're running away. . .the general idea is to leave." Draco says mockingly. Everybody in the Great Hall who'd heard Harry tell Ginny Ron had run away or been told by others as they came into the room laugh.

"You RAN AWAY because they were being mean to you?" Molly's face is as red as her hair as she screams at Ron in the headmaster's office.

"But .. ." SLAP.

"You hit me." Ron whines.

"I'm going to beat you within an inch of your life if you ever do anything so stupid again. How damn lazy are you that you have to be hexed to work on even the simplest essays?" Molly rages and Ron looks at his Dad, he'll have to pull Mum off him. But he isn't.

"What? You mean I have to keep working on schoolwork?" He bleats.

"Yes Ron, you have to work on your schoolwork." Arthur sighs.

"You're not bringing me home?"

"No, we're not bringing you home so you can sit on your dead ass all day and eat us out of house and home."

"But that's not fair." He wails. "You've got to take me home. I'm . . .I'm dying. They're starving me to death."

"Eating a normal meal instead of the eight to ten plates is not starving to death."

"Ron, you're grounded all Christmas break and next summer. Madam Umbridge, please give us assignments for him to work on while he's at home and we'll make sure he completes them." Ron's whining as he sees his life of sitting on his ass doing nothing vanishing.

"But that's not fair. I shouldn't have to do work when I'm home." He whines as Madam Umbridge drags him away from the headmaster's office.

"Since you can't be trusted not to do something stupid, you're going to be staying in here permanently. My notes are on your essays. Make the corrections I noted and expand them into three feet."

"Three feet for each essay. That will take forever. Why can't I go flying outside? It's beautiful."

"You don't have a broom."

"Harry will let me use his, after all I'm his best mate."