Naruto looks at him. "You know I have a special relationship with the family? Your father had the same relationship." Naruto nods, he knows the clan has more power in the village than the others think. "That's one reason I'm glad you're making friends with the clan. I'd hoped to see you behind the desk one day but I know you know what the job actually entails and want nothing to do with it." Naruto nods firmly.

Naruto looks at Kiriko's father a few days later. "Jiji told me. . .who they were."

"Come to the farm this weekend, no it's not a training weekend but we can share stories about your parents. Including a few that would have one or the other of them killing me for embarrassing them." he smirks. 

"Doe. . .is. . .kekkei genkai?" He asks Kiriko's father when he arrives at the farm.

"Yes, the clan had one but it was very chakra intensive and not many could use it. Your father couldn't, that's why he turned to creating things he *could* do. Your speciality is wind, right?"

"Yes?"

"Probably not then, it combines wind and water in a release." a clan elder says, tipping her head to one side. "Kiriko, send a message to that fool Jiraiya to get his ass here to teach Naruto." she bellows. "He taught your father and he's your godfather." she says at his look. "He's also Kiriko's grandfather and should have been here by now."

Kiriko summons a toad and sends that message. "You have a summons?" Naruto asks her, he thought civilians couldn't use them.

"Myeah." Kiriko makes a yesnomaybe hand waggle. "I never signed the scroll but he introduced me to his summons years ago and they like me better than they do him some days. Many of them listen in case I need help and they're more than happy to deliver messages to him. And like Grandma Miri says, he should have been here by now." The summons returns, shaking his head. "Is he in the middle of something important or just peeping?" 

"Talking with Lady Tsunade and her student."

"You know what then, have Gamabunta swallow his ass and deliver him here." the elder says sourly.

Tsunade sighs as Gamabunta does just that, packing up his supplies for the new Toad that arrives. "Thank you Lady Tsunade." He says, accepting the scroll.

"The Hokage?" She's seen him summoned that way by him in the past.

"Kiriko. It seems that Naruto has learned of his heritage and the clan summoned him to find out if he could use the Kekkei Genkai. And the fool is his godfather, he should have looked in on him by *now*." he says sourly.

Shizune swears softly as Tsunade moans. 

"Your grandfather?" Naruto asks quietly, sidling up to Kiriko as the clan elder cusses her former academy classmate out for being a damn fool.

"Dad's father. His mother was one of the working women in the village, she brought him to the clan after birth  because she knew he would be raised well by the family. Miri basically raised him." Another clan elder says. "And Kiriko's grandmother is Lady Tsunade through *her* mother, she's on an extended mission so you haven't met her yet."

The sound of leaves rustling has her looking up. "Spoke too soon."

"Oh fuck. Use the damn sigils you two." Kiriko bellows as her parents approach each other. "They are *loud* when they have sex." She says at Naruto's look. "Every building on the farm has two sets of sigils for silence, both on the buildings themselves and individual rooms. But some of that is for the snorers." Naruto sniggers despite himself.

Kiriko grabs Tsume's arm the next day on the street. "My mother is home." she says, rolling her eyes. Tsume cackles. "Then we won't be seeing your father for at least a week." Kiba, who had stiffened when the other woman had grabbed his mother, relaxes. He knows what that laugh means. Sex, lots and lots and lots of sex.

"Try two at the earliest, she *has* been gone three years." She says sourly. Kiba chuckles, that's the same look his sister gets when their mother is acting up. "I may end up living at the store for a month. Or two. Or three. The longer they're separated, the louder they get. Even with the sigils on my home *and* my room I could still hear them."

"The better the sex, the louder it is." Tsume chuckles. 

"And the greater the chance I have another brother or sister next year." Tsume laughs again, claps her on the shoulder and walks off to spread the news. Which is why Kiriko had grabbed her to pass along the news instead of one of his other friends.

"Are you still warned not to be found in closets at the academy?" Tsume asks her son. He nods. "Her parents are the reason for the warning. They were caught multiple time by the teachers but it never stopped them. They just became worse after graduation."

"Kiriko, this is an imposition but I need you to go find your grandfather and bring him back to the village." The Hokage says when he summons her to the Tower a few hours later. "I know you have a way of finding out where he is." Kiriko sighs. "He's already here, Grandma Miri asked me to use a Toad to summon his fool ass back here to see if Naruto can use the Namikaze clan Kekkei Genkai."

"Which is why I was going to ask you to go get him." He chuckles. "I understand your parents are. . ."

"are reconnecting? Yes." She says sourly. "Please gods, don't let them get caught on the roofs of the village having sex again." she moans.

"At least they're not academy students being caught in a closet again." He chuckles.

"You're.not.helping." she moans. Then winces, grabbing the Hokage. The ANBU start to move but he holds them off, recognizing the signs of a vision. She doesn't get them often but when she does. . .

"The other villages are coming to attack us again." She says, telling him and the others the whole vision.

"Do you see us ending it without bloodshed?" Hiruzen snaps.

"Yes, my parents sending everybody in the village rutting like animals." She says sourly. The ANBU cackle despite themselves. "Have a couple squads out of the village so they're not affected and gather everybody up where they're lying in the streets since all the buildings are locked up. Put them in cells and hold them until any children are born and given to the clans here to be raised before the enemy are 'taken out'. There will be *no* villages left once the Daimyo hears about this and sweeps in with his armies."

"Do have a firm date?" He asks seriously.

"Two. . .two days?" She says. "Yes, they're on the move. They're. . .she tells them where she sees them gathering and the ANBU nods, carrying her off to the hospital while the others start gathering the heads of the clans and the senior jonin. Another ANBU is sent off the to the farm, repeating what she saw and bringing her parents running. While the Hokage dashes off a message to the Daimyo.

Three days later Kiriko comes from the hospital after recovering from the migraine the visions cause, seeing the signs of rutting all over the streets as she makes her way to the store. "I will personally shove a red hot kunai up the ass of the first person who repeats that old adage about making love, not war." Hinata chuckles despite herself as she joins her. Kiriko looks at her in the store. "Soaking helps with the pain after first times, or so the clan women have told all us girls. Also with the lingering pain after birth." She recognizes the signs.

"Yes, the working women said the same thing. How. . how. . how did you know what would happen?"

"While it's not a clan gift, some of the Izuno see visions of the future. And my mother has a gift of projecting emotions, in her case lust. This has happened before, not an invasion but my parents having sex and causing the whole village to have sex."

"I. . .is that similar to how some of the medical nin can force calm on patients so they recover?"

"Yes. I also see a run on the hospital for salves and pain relievers." She says quietly. "And I see a trip for more supplies to make baby clothes, and diapers." Kiriko's probably the only person not hissing in pain sitting on a hard chair.

"Fabric for baby clothes and diapers?" She asks a few days later when she's summoned to the Tower.

"Yes, as well as more supplies for meals for the prisoners and pregnancy safe pain relievers, the hospital sent me the list." The Hokage says. "Take Naruto's team as an escort. I know he was just here." He hands her a case of money and the list that she puts in a scroll. She taps Gai on the shoulder where he's talking with Asuma. "I just got the job of heading to get supplies for the Hokage, he wants your team as my escort." He nods. "We will leave tomorrow morning then from the village, I will let the others know."

The next morning they take to the trees outside the gates, while it looks like life in Konoha is returning to normal all of them can sees the signs of trouble still around. From the guards and Daimyo arriving to the bustling hospital.

"Come.Home." Kiriko says firmly when they meet Tsunade and Shizune in the capital. "Shizune is probably the only Konoha medical nin young enough to become pregnant who is *not* pregnant if it was their fertile period." 

"Your parents?" Tsunade moans.

"Yes, but this time they had an excuse. I had a vision of the other villages trying to invade us. So I'm here picking up cloth for diapers, baby clothes, pregnancy safe medications for the hospital, and supplies for the prisoners until any females give birth. Torture and Interrogation is digging through their minds, the hospital is jacking the men off to save their sperm for future children, and I see a shitload of kids in the future for Konoha."

"Thank god, I was hoping Kiriko would find you while she was off with the others and manage to get you to come back." Hiruzen says when Tsunade and Shizune walk into his office. "I am looking at least two years of being without a good portion of the kunoichi force if they were young enough to bear children. That's not counting the genin and any academy students old enough for sexual intercourse. I see a drastic need for midwives since so many of the women who deliver the children will be having their own." Tsunade nods. "If all the working women are *not* pregnant it's because it wasn't their time to be fertile, and I did not need to know the sexual proclivities of so many of my ninja. Who likes to be beaten, who likes to be humiliated, who needs to hold a stuffed animal. . .and those are the men." Tsunade brays with laughter despite herself. Hiruzen just gives her a 'not.helping' look. "And of course Jiraiya is taking notes for another damn book of his."

The head of the hospital sighs in relief as Kiriko hands her the scroll. "Thank you, I fear these will be needed more in the future than your special scroll for that time of the month."

The Daimyo returns to the capital, contacting the others on his television system and sending their guards off to inspect the villages the captured ninja have come from. Three weeks later he gets the report that he passes along to Hiruzen.

"Fuck, well I was expecting it." He sighs.

"The other villages were empty?" Jiraiya asks.

"Yes, the few civilians they had probably ran off the second they left. Everything will be packed up and sent to us to look through and the villages allowed to fall to ruin."

A tap on the door has Hiruzen looking that direction. Kiriko leans in the doorway. "Do we have places where parents with jobs can take the children to be watched? Both civilians and those who don't have clans to watch the children?" Hiruzen moans but makes a note. "Yes, they will be needed. As well as more money for the orphanage no doubt."

Kiriko gathers Tenten and Hinata. "Girls, if you are pregnant and need a place to leave the baby while you're on missions or training for the day the farm is available."

"Thank you, I've been talking with Neji. He has been told quite firmly that if I am pregnant we can leave them at the Nara clan compound." 

"The branch house has offered to take my child if I am pregnant but I am . . .concerned the remaining Main House members might try something."

"Leave them with us," Shikamaru's mother says walking past. "One more won't make that big of a difference." She looks at Kiriko. "Baby supplies?"

"I brought in fabric for clothes and diapers, as we know how many pregnancies we're looking at we're start making everything." She nods in satisfaction. Then sighs. "I know it was for a good reason, but I so hate your parents right now."

"Join the club." Kiriko sighs. "They're *still* going at it back home. Thank god I was able to get some sleep when the Hokage had me go get that stuff."

Shikamaru's mother cackles softly and pats her on the shoulder. "They were that bad when we were students."

"Yes, the Hokage reminded me how many times they'd been caught in academy closets when he learned Mom was back home and they were 'reconnecting'."

Shikamaru's mother walks off sniggering. 

"I thought your father was a civilian?"

"He is. . .now. He chose to leave the corps when his team was forced to disband due to injuries. He didn't fail the test so his chakra wasn't bound but his strengths lie elsewhere and like the rest of the clan he keeps in practice. Mom stayed in the corps and is one of those kunoichi who are dispatched on long term missions."

"Like Asuma."

"Yep."

"Oh thank god." Kiriko moans when she wakes up to blessed silence.

"Yes, your parents *finally* got it out of their systems." One of the clan elders sighs as she slumps at the table, spooning out a bowl of porridge and adding toppings. "Are we rescheduling the training sessions since we couldn't do it while they were going at it?"

"That would have two back to back, just skip it until the next one." Another elder says. Everybody nods.