"Just when you think your brother can't get any stupider." Hermione shakes her head.

"I know." Ginny rolls her eyes. "Dad apologized for it, but he had to stop giving us allowances, he needs to put that money towards replacing my furniture. Not that that made Won-Won all that miserable, it meant that we didn't have an allowance now either. Little shit."

"Let me know if you need any money Hogsmeade weekends."

"We've got it covered Harry." Fred says.

"We've got money saved from our jobs that we can give Ginny."

"And I've been saving my allowance."

"Harry, Hermione, can we talk after dinner?" Fleur asks, coming over to their table. "Viktor and I have been talking about something and I am troubled."

"Of course, is the Gryffindor common room good or do you want a little privacy."

"Privacy would be good, I think." Viktor rumbles.

"Mr. Potter, Mr. Weasley requires an assistant in the second task. Would you be willing?" Harry is asked a couple weeks later during the first Hogsmeade weekend of the year.

"Fuck.No." Harry snorts, not looking up from the paper he's reading. "Better yet, Fuck you!"

"But he's your best friend!" Madam Umbridge bleats. Cornelius is stunned that Potter told him no. How dare he? Doesn't the little shit know Corny is the Minister of Magic? She's going to have to show him who's the boss when the school year is over. Let's see how brave the little bastard is when she sicks a dementor on his precious family. He's still underage and will use his magic to protect them, then she and her precious Corny will have him. Yes, that's exactly what she'll do.

"No, he is not my best friend. He's a manipuative user and loser. I'm friends with Fleur and Viktor, so I know that my assistance," Harry sneers that word, making Umbridge, Bagman, and Crouch flinch. "Would find me stuck in the bottom of the lake waiting for that fucking fool to rescue me. No. I'm not doing it, neither is Hermione. . .and I've contacted the wizengamot, this is an order barring you from taking any current or former Hogwarts student to use in this travesty." He pulls a parchment with the wizengamot seal from his pocket. He and Hermione both have copies on them at all times because they figured this would be happening. "There are similar orders from the French and Bulgarian Ministries, we all know that Gabrielle would be chosen for Fleur." What Harry tells the three next is rather obscene and would have points taken left, right, and center if they were at Hogwarts. Clapping has him looking around to see Hermione, Ginny, Luna, Fleur, Viktor, assorted Hogwarts, Beauxbatons, and Durmstrang students watching him. The most shocking thing is Professor McGonagall is standing by them smiling.

"Can they do that?" Fudge asks a couple days later, wringing his hat in his hands.

"Legally yes, the Tri-Wizard Tournament does not have the authority to overturn Ministry Mandates. And using an innocent child would see us lynched. We're going to have to use something else."

"But inanimate objects won't have the same affect on the crowd as the Champions rescuing their loved ones. If it was the other way around, Potter would be rescuing Weasley."

"No he wouldn't," Albus snorts. "Harry loathes the little shit. It's only Ron that thinks they're best friends."

"Are you saying Weasley lied to me?" Fudge is stunned. Who would dare lie to the Minister of Magic?

"Weasley lives in his own world where everybody bows down and kisses his arse because he exists." Severus says drily. "When reality intrudes upon his fantasies it's not fair and people are being mean to him."

"I can order the Aurors to take them." Fudge said.

"They would be expecting it and deal violence on the aurors, and any with half a brain would tell you where to shove your orders. You would find yourself in front of the wizengamot again, but this time you'd be the one facing charges.

"They can't do that to me, I'm the Minister." he bleats.

"You're the damn fool who's trying to grasp at straws to make a tournament that never should have been revived something to talk about in awe instead of in disgust like people have been. The Hogwarts champion is an idiot and everybody knows it. The Beauxbaton and Durmstrang champions would not be continuing this spectacle if their magic didn't depend on it."

"But what about the glory of being part of the tri-wizard tournament?"

"What glory? The students had to leave their school for the year, travel to another country and live in temporary quarters while trying to keep their schooling up. Our classes are seen as a joke, Madam Maxine's history of magic teacher has been tutoring the students who are going to be taking their OWLS this summer because Binns only talks about the bloody Goblin Rebellion. If you want to pass, you study on your own."

"But that's a Hogwarts tradition. Having to work for something you want without the help of others prepares you for the future." He howls.

"No, it's called having an incompetent teacher." Albus snorts.

Fudge storms off, he'll show them. Potter will be participating in the second task, whether he wanted to or not. He immediately goes to Bones and is stunned when she tells him the same thing that old fool Dumbledore had, trying to force Potter into being bait in the second task is illegal and her aurors would tell him where to shove his order if he went behind her back. . .or she'd have their jobs and they'd be looking at time on the other side of a holding cell. Then when he went back to the office to try to draft new laws that would allow the tri-wizard tournament to take hostages. . .willing or otherwise he found a barrister from the offices of Dewey, Screwem, and Howe with a letter saying that attempting to force Lord Potter into participating in the second task would see both the Potter, Black, and assorted fortunes under their control leaving the European wizarding world and all the businesses they own or have control of closing. A representative from the goblins arrives next to deliver a letter saying that trying to force Lord Potter into participating would be seen as an act of war. Fudge gulps as he sees a list of their properties, businesses, and money.

That's followed by a simple letter from Sirius Black. You need us, we don't need you. Bother Harry again and we're gone. The European wizarding world would collapse and you'll be blamed. This is your only warning.

Fudge lays his head in his hands, how had everything gone so wrong. Potter should be a meek little boy who would leap at the chance to do whatever the Minister of Magic wanted and should be willing to hang onto every word that comes from his lips like they were Galleons.

One cold morning in February Hermione bundles in the new winter clothes that Sirius had brought her and Harry for Christmas, sipping the hot cocoa Dobby had made for them as they sit in the bubble of warmth that Harry had created.

"Welcome everybody to the second task in the tri-wizard tournament. Each champion has an object in the water that they must get in under an hour to receive points. If they do not retrieve the item, they lose all their points and the object vanishes forever. Due to some . . .concerns about using live people as the objects to be retrieved. . ."

"WHAT?" Yells of outrage from the crowd and Bagman winces. Maybe trying to blame the people who didn't want to be stuck in the water had been a bad idea. Gulping he tries to wave down the complaints. Finally the crowd silences.

Viktor and Fleur are told what objects they will be retrieving and Bagman turns to Weasley.

"Mr. Weasley, your object is signed by the Chudley cannons."

"My contract. My precious." Ron purrs.

"That was an awful Tolkein impression." Hermione sighs.

"Tolkein?" Sirius asks.

"A muggle author, he's got a three book series about a wizard, elves, hobbits, and dwarves who travel across a place called Middle Earth in search of an evil ring that they have to destroy. One of the bad guys keeps calling the ring my precious."

"Hermione, that's an old wizarding tale."

"No, it's a series of muggle books." Harry says. "There was another book that took place before the other stories, it was called the Hobbit."

"Do you have these books?"

"No, but they're usually available in any muggle bookstore." Harry says.

"Write them down for me and I'll pick them up this weekend when I go into London." Remus says. Hermione nods.

"Can I look at them when you get them?" Ginny asks. Neville is looking at them too. "I know the wizarding story."

"Me too, Grams told me the stories as I was growing up."

"And Dad told us."

"And we're off. Miss Delacour and Mister Krum take off their overrobes and dive into the water."

"Accio my contract." Ron thinks he's being sooo clever by accio'ing it. But nothing happens.

"ACCIO my contract." Maybe screaming the first word will make it work this time.

Nu-uh.

"ACCIO MY CONTRACT!" Ron screams at the top of his lungs. It has to work this time. Still nothing. He looks at Viktor and Fleur who have already headed into the water, then turns to Bagman.

"I can't swim." he whines.

"Keep trying Mr. Weasley." he says encouragingly.

"Accio Ron Weasley's contract." He screams, shaking his wand. Saying his name has to make his precious, precious contract fly to him.

"You know, Weasley is an idiot but he does have the right idea." Fleur looks over at Viktor as they arrive at the place they should dive down.

"As my grandmama always said, even a stopped clock is right twice a day. Accio Viktor Krum's object." Fleur follows suit and soon two wrapped objects are by them. Grabbing them before they can sink again, they tie the lines around their waists and start swimming back to shore. Fleur starts faltering and Viktor reaches out, towing her partway until they can reach ground and walk out. They both drop to their knees, Bagman taking their bundles as warm blankets are wrapped around them and they're taken to the medical tent.

"I'm sorry Mr. Weasley, but time has run out and your object is lost to you forever."

Ron drops to his knees, staring up at the sky and screaming. "NNNNNNOOOOO!!!"

"Who the fuck thought sitting outside in the middle of a Scottish winter for a couple hours watching Weasley wave his wand was entertaining?" Malfoy complains as he heads back to the Slytherin Dorm. "My father will hear about this."

"Malfoy's a git, but he was right about this, whoever thought staring at a lake in the middle of winter was a good idea is cracked." Ginny murmurs to Hermione as they head to the Gryffindor Tower. "Thank God for heating charms. Even with them I'm half frozen and I hear Viktor and Fleur are in the hospital wing."

"What are we supposed to do with him?" Bagman asks, pointing at Ron who's still having hysterics. Sighing, Umbridge hexes him and floats him back to the castle, dumping him in his room to scream about how it wasn't fair before she goes off to share a bottle or two of firewhiskey with Corny. Thanks to Bagman's big mouth, the next few days are going to be rough for the ministry. Her pookie bear will be troubled.